‘Going inward’ is a relatively new term I learned through the course of my supervision and studies towards becoming a licensed professional counselor. The act of going inward is something that I have been diligently practicing since 2010, when I finally decided to buckle down (onto a cushion) and begin a daily meditation practice.
When I am working with clients, I begin most sessions with a mindfulness exercise to help the person root by getting more grounded within themselves and connect with their body and emotions through awareness of their breath.
Recently, I attended a mindfulness workshop where the presenter asked us to free write on what vulnerability is and what vulnerability feels like. Here’s what I wrote for both.
Vulnerability is: raw, open, scary, freeing, painful, courageous, truth, and connection. It is loving yourself enough and another enough to be, feel, and share the real you.
Vulnerability feels like:
-You’re ripping open a piece of your heart
-Unpeeling a hard orange
-Overwhelming
-Anxiousness in my belly
-Unlocking a treasure box
-Putting my sword and armor down
-Weakness and strength
-Removing a brick from the wall
-Being naked
-Fire and light
After writing, the presenter instructed us to close our eyes and see how we were feeling after having reflected on vulnerability and written about it. Going inward for me meant getting out of my head and feeling more of what was happening in my body. I felt my heart beating faster and pressure in my chest. She asked us to feel the sensations in our body and locate the place where we might be feeling emotional discomfort. She then asked us to soften into that place, then soothe ourselves by putting one hand on that place, and finally to allow for the discomfort to be there without being afraid of it.
The power of writing never ceases to amaze me. This exercise of reflection, writing, then closing my eyes to really feel and acknowledge what was happening inside is what I consider to be a beautiful path of going inward.
The next time that you feel angry, stressed, confusion or doubt about something happening in your life, try going inward and see what you find.
Remember these simple things: soften, soothe, and allow.