Heartfulness

In Asian languages, the word for ‘mind’ and the word for ‘heart’ are the same. So if you’re not hearing mindfulness in some deep way as heartfulness, you’re not really understanding it. Compassion and kindness towards oneself are intrinsically woven into it. You could think of mindfulness as wise and affectionate attention. ~ Jon Kabat-Zinn

This amazing quote above was shared in one of the first in person yoga classes I attended in 2021. Hallelujah...We come together again.

A few months ago, I felt more than ready to get back to in person yoga. My heart ached for that feeling of togetherness when community joins to move and breathe in sync. To my surprise, there was a yoga studio down the street from my house. It’s a 6 minute bike ride. What a gift!

Tuesday evenings there is a Yin class which I really enjoy, but also desperately need. The class helps me slow down, feel centered, and connect more deeply with my body & spirit.

Rewind back to 2010. I was working as an elementary school counselor and just beginning to understand the importance of adopting the discipline of a daily meditation practice. My father had taken me to learn TM – Transcendental Meditation at the ripe age of 10, but I had not picked up the practice with consistency until my early 30’s.

During this time in my life, I had a lot of unresolved and suppressed emotions, I was struggling with moderate depression that felt more like a plateau than waves. My mind was completely and utterly FULL.

One day I was sitting on my ex-boyfriend’s couch with my laptop in hand trying to figure out how to start a blog. I remember naming the blog MIND FULLNESS. After all, we write what we know about.

Back then, I had dabbled in learning about what mindfulness was, I even tried to practice it on and off my meditation cushion. I knew what it was, but I didn’t truly understand that it would become my path towards healing, reconnecting and knowing my authentic SELF.

Rewind back to 2000. I am working for Americorps as a Literacy Tutor in a low socio-economic school teaching the sweetest, most tender Hispanic children I’d ever met how to read. One day I found a sticker that read SELF, just like this in all caps. Something about this sticker intrigued me. I decided to take it home and stick it onto my tall lamp stand. I looked at that sticker everyday for at least a year. Even then, I had no idea what the SELF even meant. Yes, I knew the self was me, you, him, her. But the true meaning of SELF was still a mystery to me.

This quote above is one that I think could save us all from a lot of pain and struggle.

If someone important to us pulled us aside at the perfect, most innocent age of 5 or 6 to explain that our mind is essentially our heart, perhaps we would all understand ourselves more clearly. We would value our heart center and what it feels just as much as we value our brain and what it has to say/think.

Society tells us that Intelligence matters most because it’s what makes us Successful.

But why aren’t people talking about staying connected to the Heart so we can Experience Feelings, Sensations, Our Truest SELF?

If we knew as children that our mind was the same as our heart, we would give equal value to these parts of us. We would soon understand why it’s less important to pay such close attention to our Brain Weasels and why it is absolutely necessary for us to listen to our Heart Beet.

A Full Mind Hurts, a Full Heart Feels & Heals and So You Grow.

Conscious Transformations Are What Life is All About

This post is to commemorate the lovely spirits who joined the first Meditation Groups offered by Root&Connect. The mission was to help people learn how to strengthen the most highly evolved part of our brain - the Prefrontal Cortex - so that we can learn how to be Receptive & Respond to our internal world - Emotions, Sensations, and Thoughts - with more ease rather than React or feel Resistance to it.

Once we are able to shift our Resistance & Reactivity to Receptivity & Responsiveness, Our Inner & Outer Experience of the World Changes for the Better. We Feel Calm, Courageous & Clear.

The participants were asked to share about their experience of being in the 6 week group and here is what they had to say….

Brytani says:

If you are interested in a wild journey, paradoxically leading you both inward (reflective, meditative) and outward (creative, expansive) at the same time, then you absolutely should consider taking this group and giving it the chance it deserves.

Root&Connect: Did you get what you needed from the group?

I really needed to operate out of a higher state of mind, out of a more mindful and intentional space. This book and this group has helped increase my capacity to live presently and fully in the small (and big) moments of life. The depth of my daily experiences has expanded. I choose to live my life and refuse to let life run me down.

Root&Connect: What tools have you learned that you know you will remember & keep in your life tool box to use?

The simple practice of paying attention to my body and responding appropriately has really helped me also process the emotions I carry in my body (good and bad). As a result, I have been able to identify emotional patterning and work towards changing patterns that do not serve my whole self. I was previously giving my mind permission to run away with thoughts ridden with anxiety and fear. I am no longer letting my mind run away with itself, but have tapped into the power of my conscious being and use that as a guide to life.

Lilli says:

This group was a great start to the practice of mediation. It really opened my eyes to the beauty and freedom that can come from simply learning to sit with oneself. I would recommend the group to anyone wishing to create a meditation practice for themselves. I’ve struggled on and off to dedicate myself to meditating and I feel this group gave me some great tools to embrace the process.

Andrew says:

Root&Connect: What tools have you learned that you know you will remember & keep in your life tool box to use?

I think daily discipline is important. Also, sharing thoughts, ideas and experiences with a group of accepting, thoughtful people is a really important part of the class.

Emily says:

I would highly recommend this course to anyone looking to grow a better connection with themselves. I feel as though these last 6 weeks gave me the tools to build a meaningful, daily meditation practice that truly feels like it is my own. Additionally, the course reading was incredibly enlightening, and eye opening to the things that can deter us from becoming our true selves. The reading brought up some important tools, ways to handle emotions, and how to cope with negative thought patterns.

Root&Connect: What tools have you learned that you know you will remember & keep in your life tool box to use?

The understanding that thoughts and emotions are not cold hard facts, but rather they either have the power to take you over ONLY if you allow them too.

Naomi says:

I learned that meditation is one of the powerful tools to heal my own weaknesses and past events. However, I did not know how to exactly meditate. This class gave me a clear guidance on how to meditate with my own needs daily. I strongly suggest this group to increase your awareness.

Rachael says:

This is a great group to dive further into self discovery and understanding. I don’t think you could

participate in this group and not leave understanding yourself better. It was a wonderful way to set up

a strong self guided practice that can be maintained going forward.

Root&Connect: Did you get what you needed from the group?

I love getting different perspectives and inputs within the same practice. I love growing in experiences

I have had in meditation and knowing that I have only scratched the surface. I went into this group with

hopes of deepening my daily practice, diving much deeper in self understanding, with hopes of

transforming some relationships in my life. Though, I do not feel a huge shift immediately during this

group, I feel like I was given foundational tools to work on this transformation journey going forward.

Tine says:

It's an education about life. You learn to connect with your inner self. Get many tools to connect with your emotions. You learn to observe your patterns...And having a good facilitator with lots of years of experience as a counselor. Who also is a yoga teacher. And loves to continue to grow herself is a gift.

Root&Connect: Did you get what you needed from the group?

I did feel accepted in the group. It's a nice peaceful group. It's good to hear about the struggles of the people in the group so I see it's not just me struggling with it. It helps me to accept my own struggles. It's nice to hear they have similar experiences/patterns in their life so you don't feel like you are the only one with those experiences. The guided meditations are very powerful in group. Angela's meditations are really nice. They just resonate with me.

Todd says:

This 6 week course has lead to some profound changes in my live. Through the daily meditations taught in this group I have started to change some of my core consciousness and this has altered how I respond in various life situations. This has created genuine and profound change in my life.

Root&Connect: What tools have you learned that you know you will remember & keep in your life tool box to use?

1) When feeling strong emotions, don’t attempt to control it by numbing the pain or intellectualizing the situation, strip away the story and your thoughts, and just be in the emotion. No matter how strong that feeling is, it will pass and you will feel good having let that energy flow through you.

2) Negative thought patterns cause pathways and the more you avoid them in the moment.. the less powerful they become.

3) Try to keep your heart open as much as you can, if you shut down, be aware that you are shut down.

“Dear Group Participants,

It was such a pleasure to be with you and do the work with you! Remember these wise words:

To Keep our Faces Toward Change, and Behave Like Free Spirits in the Presence of Fate is Strength Undefeatable.
~ Helen Keller”

— Root&Connect

Mental Well-Being

Life is full of twists and turns. Just like a river, it’s unpredictable. We never truly know what is coming next.

A river keeps on flowing. At times, it runs slow and peaceful. Other times, it becomes quick with forceful rapids that can feel threatening.

Our purpose is to do the work on the inside of us so that no matter how the river flows, we can remain calm and hopeful about what is ahead.

The beauty of it all is that the river does lead to something vast, a wide open space with an amazing horizon to look out upon where possibilities are endless.

The ocean of our life is when we have reached a place within ourselves where we can be fully present for our Self and others with an open heart & a calm mind while we trust that our emotions will come and go (they all have something to teach us) & our spirit is always guiding the way.

Whole, Worthy, and Transformed

This book was inspired by a conversation with a client who I admire for his brave efforts and dedication to do the work of diving inside and consciously healing.

I hope you enjoy this short, meaningful read. Coming to you straight from:

• my heart

• my mind

• my spirit

• my emotions

• the amazing knowledge I have gained about Self from my own life experiences

• the wonderful people who have crossed my path seeking guidance & who teach me so much

Let us all remember that We Are Worthy because we were made Whole and because we exist on beautiful Mama Earth.

The Real You

This topic is about as complex as it is to experience life as a human being.

Let's start from the beginning. You were born a perfect, innocent, pure bundle of love that brought light and joy to all those around you. Your smiles and cooing invoked great delight for the people who loved you even before they got to meet you. From inside your mother's womb otherwise known as the 'baby room', you could hear and feel the energy of your surroundings.

Conception gives birth to your spirit which begins to grow into human form so that you can come into being. And with this transformation is an ability for awareness. Consciousness is sensory awareness of the body, the self, and the world.

A fetus can be aware of the body through perceiving pain, reacting to touch, smell, sound, and showing facial expressions in response to external stimuli.

Science relates consciousness to neuronal features in the brain with the capacity for introspection and expressing one's mental state verbally or nonverbally.

Spirituality relates consciousness with becoming a sentient being, one who perceives and feels things. This awareness is what allows us to exist with purpose and experience a sense of freedom we all innately crave and long for.

Earlier this year, my godfather and I truly connected for the first time as adults over a long phone call. Our paths have not crossed for many years due to him living in Florida, being highly focused on work, and dedicated to his family life. There is also quite a bit of an age gap between us. He reached out to congratulate me on my marriage and in the midst of our conversation, he mentioned a book that he said had changed his entire life and perspective on reality – The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer.

As a slow reader, I take time getting through books because I like to ingest and digest information. To my surprise, each chapter of this book unpeels a new layer of awareness that in some ways I have known and experienced, but haven't put words to.

The best part of the Untethered Soul is the discovery of the heart and the substantial role it plays in our lives.

In the chapter called 'the secrets of the spiritual heart', we learn that that heart governs the course of our lives through the energy shifts and variations that take place.

Singer says, “The heart is one of our most powerful energy centers through which energy focuses, distributes, and flows. The way that the heart controls our energy flow is by opening and closing. Similar to a valve, the heart can either allow the flow of energy to pass through or restrict the flow of energy from passing through. When our heart closes, it becomes blocked by stored, unfinished energy patterns from our past.

Understanding your heart as a sort of energy thermometer that opens when you feel calm & safe or closes when you feel fearful & insecure, is a useful tool available at all times. The essential piece to remember is to focus on your heart by placing your hand on it whenever you sense a change in your energy flow. Practice centered consciousness by being aware enough in the moment to ask yourself questions that can help you get clarity so that you can return to your regular state of calm & safety.

The questions to ask yourself with curiosity while hand on beating heart are:

'what am I feeling?', 'what is happening to me right now?', 'why am I feeling this way?', 'how do I let this go after I understand what this is?'

And by let this go, 'how do I allow this energy to pass through and become unblocked so that I can open my heart and allow energy to flow again?

This is a powerful practice because you are learning the process of setting yourself free from suffering. Free from fearing the energy of your emotions and free from the torment of your psyche (mind/thoughts). When you experience a shift in your energy, you are checking in with your source- the heart rather than your servant- the mind.

Have you ever heard that your mind makes a good servant, but a terrible master?

Let's loop back to where we started on consciousness- sensory awareness of the body, the self, and the world. Our senses are in charge of converting information and making impressions in our mind. Singer says, 'if the energy patterns that come into our psyche create disturbance, we will resist them, not allow them to pass, and energy patterns get blocked within us.'

So you see impressions are made and released, then processed freely just as long as they do not disturb our psyche.

Long ago when we wanted to escape in our minds because feeling sensations and emotions in our body was too painful, we made an unconscious decision to give our mind all of the power. We told ourselves to stay in our mind and make it in charge of getting us what we want and ensuring we are ‘safe’ from pain.

Because we are a society that leans heavily on the mind while all too often disregarding the heart, we are trapped by our incessant thinking about our psychological well-being because our psyche is fragile and easily perturbed.

The light at the end of the spiraling tunnel is to bravely choose conscious awareness of our heart and senses that live in our body so that we can discover the amazing truth that we actually don't have to put up with, or protect our psyche.

When our mind is bothered by an impression, we use awareness to stop and witness the disturbance, but instead of entertaining the nuisance in our head, we redirect our focused energy to our heart center. This way we process what we are experiencing by acknowledging the shift in our body temperature and the heat in our heart which pain creates. This burning sensation is called the fire of yoga.

We feel it and then we let go because we know that each time we allow ourselves to feel pain, our pain is being purified by our heart.

We no longer have to be codependent on our mind. We don't have to think all of the time. And when our mind is thinking, we don't have to give our attention to it. We don't have to believe the stories it tells us.

When we understand that we are human beings made up of pure consciousness, we can become the observer of our thoughts and feelings, the observer who notices everything through a lens of conscious awareness.

Singer says, 'the overall system of perception is meant to take things in, allow you to experience them, and then let them pass through so that you're fully present in the moment. Experiences are gifts being given to you and as they come in, you are learning and growing. Your heart and mind are expanding and you are being touched at a very deep level.'

By acknowledging that our heart reigns, we are set free to be and live a different kind of reality. We enter the gateway to freedom and liberation. We transform into an untethered soul, the same way we began and came into being.

“The prerequisite to true freedom is to decide that you do not want to suffer anymore. You must decide that you want to enjoy your life and that there is no reason for stress, inner pain, or fear.”

— Michael A. Singer

“One of the essential requirements for true spiritual growth and deep personal transformation is coming to peace with pain. No expansion or evolution can take place without change, and periods of change are not always comfortable. ”

— Michael A. Singer

America

Yesterday, was a yang yin day. Light then dark, all in a span of a few hours.

Waking up to hear of Georgia's victorious win for Reverend Raphael Warnock brought a sense of joy and confirmation that this IS a new year and it will be better than 2020.

When a black man rises above all odds, makes history, and proves that anything is possible, this is marked as a day of celebration to honor him for his accomplishment.

Rather than stay focused on this historic victory, our attention was redirected towards a familiar chaos from last year. It was a jolting reminder that we live in a white America where the white man can take power and seize control any damn time he pleases.

The chaos at the capital was not exactly a shock, but I definitely felt an array of emotions ranging from anger, disgust, fear, anxiety, outrage to disappointment, shame, embarrassment and deep sadness.

Then the thoughts came: 'Is this for real?', 'America has now become a live version of Maury Povich', 'And we call ourselves a first world country?'

Circling back to my emotions, the one that stuck around was surprisingly compassion. I found myself feeling compassion for all of the lost souls in America who seem to believe that their soon to be former leader actually cares about them and their well-being.

Compassion for those lost souls whose behaviors are fueled by feelings of insecurity, fear, anger or greed. People who have felt inferior or less than throughout most of their lives and seemed to have forgotten or never been taught that people are people. That all human beings have a birthright to be treated with kindness and respect and given equal opportunity

The Americas were first inhabited by humans who did not look white, act white, or follow Anglo traditions and beliefs. But for some reason, in the unfolding of history, people have honored the fair skinned as being better than, just for the simple fact that it represents goodness, purity, and innocence.

As one of the founding fathers of America, Thomas Jefferson was said to have believed that the Native Americans were a noble race, equal in both body and mind to the white man, and endowed with an innate moral sense and marked capacity for reason. Despite these attributes being acknowledged as valuable and worthy of their dignity, he also believed that Indian lands should be taken over by white people because the Native Americans were culturally and technologically inferior.

The question to ask here is: inferior to whose standards?

One might say that the white man’s relentless struggle to remain powerful and in control is rooted from feeling inferior with no cultural logic. Even so, Indian removal was passed by Congress in 1831 and here we are now in 2021 with the same kind of distorted beliefs running our nation.

This morning I listened to NPR's The Takeaway and then stumbled upon a video that my passionate, political friend (also white woman) posted on instagram. She made some valid points that stirred up discomfort, sadness, and lastly anger. The one that really hit home was that if yesterday’s chaos would have involved a mob of men from any race other than white, those men would have been beaten or worse killed by police. Yesterday's madness could have resulted in a horrific blood bath. Since the invasion was made up of mostly white men, they were not only pardoned, but also consoled by their leader who is blind to see and truly understand the magnitude of crazy that he breathes and breeds in others.

I tried using my anger to fuel a sense of empowerment and think thoughts that better days ARE ahead.

Then I called my friend and extended gratitude for her having the courage to be vulnerable, speak up, and share her truth on social media platforms for anyone to see. The words you see written above in color are what I said to her before reminding her that the path to healing this country is through love and offering compassion to the people who are blind, ignorant, misinformed, wounded, or insane.

Just after the 2016 election, I wrote a blog post on Vulnerability because this was the emotional state I was experiencing. Most of my clients then were in a similar boat. It is 4 years later, not much has changed, and we are barely hanging on by a string or at least it feels that way on most days. We all are tired of feeling helpless and hopeless.

On the flipside, there is hope. Each one of us can make a choice to help in the movement towards real equality and social justice. No matter our race, color or background, we are people. We do have the power to make a difference and create change through our hearts and minds and more importantly through TAKING ACTIONS.

As for myself, I choose to stay positive and believe that this will pass and that we as a country will recover. We will continue to make progress. Progress is progress regardless of whether or not it is slow, even if it ebbs and flows. Let's acknowledge the ebb of the last 4 years and set our sights on a flow for a more just future.

insights for the year 2021

It's a wonderful thing to be optimistic. It keeps you healthy and it keeps you resilient.

~ Daniel Kahneman ~ Psychologist-Nobel Prize Winner

Amidst the confusion of the times, the conflicts of conscience, in the turmoil of daily living, our faith becomes an anchor to our lives.

~ Thomas S. Monson - 1927-2018, American Religious Leader

I Am Grateful For...

Movement and Rest. Dark and Light. Warmth and Cool. Full and Empty.

Fall is the season of vibrant colors, bare naked branches, and dried up marriages of leaves that cover the ground. It is a time of transition, change, and slowing down to take it all in.

The words that come to mind for Fall are inspiration, vitality, brisk, biting, cool, crisp, clear. Ayurveda describes it as dry, rough, windy, erratic, cool, subtle, and clear.

The definition of fall is to move downward, typically rapidly and freely without control, from a higher to a lower level; (of a person) lose one's balance and collapse.

Fall nudges us to stop for longer periods of time. It encourages us to relax more so that we can allow our bodies to rest and spirits to grow from the fertile experiences of spring and vibrancy of summer. This shift in energy is one we naturally crave, but sometimes fight. We need Rest.

The definition of rest is to cease from action or movement; to refrain from labor or exertion; to give rest to the eyes.

Give yourself permission to rest in the way that your body and mind need and call for.

Even when your mind is telling you to go, go, go or move, move, move or do, do, do, it is up to you to make the conscious choice to quiet these thoughts and give space to what needs most attention- YOU.

I love this quote from an article called Fall Guide which talks about using Ayurvedic practices to soothe and stabilize ourselves during the Vata season, 'The autumn harbors a certain emptiness that leave us feeling exposed and little raw, but it is also filled with possibility – a time when we, too, can strip down to a quiet essence of being and savor the simplicity' written by Melody Mischke.

Feel gratitude for the option to rest and choose it freely without guilt or feeling that if you rest, this means you are lazy and not doing enough. Rest is just as important for us as movement. Being still and silent nourishes us in ways we need to feel whole, rooted and connected to ourselves and everything else around us.

This holiday season of what has been one of the most intense, difficult years for human existence, give yourself the gift of doing less and being more.

My dear cousin Pina gifted me with this painting when I visited her in Norway. I was immediately drawn to it because I have always been a wanderer who likes to move, explore and adventure. I saw myself in these shoes.

Here's a little tune for what I now think of when I look at this painting...

'These shoes are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do...one of these days these shoes are gonna come off and rest right next to you.'

I am grateful for all of the beautiful things that God has blessed me with: a mind, body, spirit, emotions, a caring heart, wonderful people I call family, friends, clients and my two furball cats.

I am grateful for my curiosity, hope, faith, creativity, compassion, inspiration, wisdom, vulnerability, and courage.

Most of all I am grateful for the experience of living Life. Moving with the earth and resting in the comfort of its seasons whose cycle we can trust and embrace.

painting by my niece Julia Montague

Internal Landscape

Above is an image of how I imagine my internal landscape. Chakra energy centers that allow the flow of energy through my body, my big ol heart that I consciously try to keep open as often as possible, and my inner child who needs my attention as much as I need attention from others.

What does the inside of you look like?

Do you know what you feel and where in your body you feel it?

During my yoga training days almost 10 years ago, I heard the teacher direct us towards our internal landscape and what popped in my mind was 'is she talking about the geography of my insides?'

Shortly thereafter I realized that she wasn't talking about our actual organs, tissue, or muscles; she was bringing awareness to the inner world of our bodies because this is what the practice of yoga helps us to discover.

In the latest book I've been reading The Untethered Soul, there is a chapter called the Inner Roommate which refers to the mental voice (our inner critic) and the ways it controls us.

It reads 'Until you've watched your roommate long enough to truly understand the predicament you're in, you really have no basis for practices that help you deal with the mind. Once you've made the decision to free yourself from the mental melodrama, you are ready for teachings and techniques. You will now have a real use for them.'

'There are those who have gone before you who found themselves in the same situation. They were given teachings and techniques, such as yoga, which were created to help in this process. Yoga is not really about getting your body healthy, although it does that too. Yoga is about the knowledge that will help you out of your predicament, the knowledge that can free you. Once you've made this freedom the meaning of your life, there are spiritual practices that can help you. These practices are what you do with your time in order to free yourself from yourself. You will eventually catch on that you have to distance yourself from your psyche.'

Our bodies internal landscape waits for us to become familiar with its energy, shape, texture, sensations, and emotions. The longer we choose to stay focused on remaining 'safe' or distracted in our heads, the more likely it is that our inner roommate (mental voice) will continue to dictate how we think, feel, operate, relate with others, and most importantly treat our Self.

Most people think that if they spend time doing intense workouts, that means they are connecting with their body. Any form of movement is good and building muscle is important, however, more intense exercise does not allow for oxygen to reach the brain. Slower moving exercises such as walking, various forms of yoga, tai chi, and Qi gong allow us to breathe easily and normally.

Less force on the body opens us up to form a deeper connection with it through the practice of combining breath and movement. This is the process of transforming our relationship with our mind and body so that when someone asks us about our internal landscape, we can say with confidence and ease that we know what our Self looks and feels like on the inside.

For more information on the importance of getting oxygen to the brain, visit:

http://www.nacd.org/my-brain-needs-oxygen-what-can-i-do/#:~:text=3)%20Take%20short%20walks%20throughout,being%20carried%20to%20your%20brain.

The Important A's

It's been a while since I sat down to write. I'd like to blame it on Corona Life because why not, but the truth is that it's been difficult to focus during this time. Recently, a wise friend reminded me that the energy of the planet is all stirred up and kinda whacky so naturally our own energy is going to be affected by it whether we are consciously aware of it or not.

I've struggled with ADD for the majority of my life. It runs in the ol' familia. And with ADD (or ADHD) come other things such as depression, anxiety, anger, irritability, boredom, impulsivity, difficulty focusing and short attention span. Since writing takes quite a bit of energy and focus, my mind will redirect me to do other things while my spirit whispers to me each day, “Angela, please write what you know.”

During quarantine time, I picked up a book from the little library box in our neighborhood called Bird by Bird Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott. This book has been both entertaining and informative. There is a chapter called Perfectionism where she says, “perfectionism will ruin your writing, blocking inventiveness and playfulness and life force. Perfectionism means that you try desperately not to leave so much mess to clean up. But clutter and mess show us that life is being lived.”

This got me thinking about my own perfectionism and all the ways I've worked with it by loving, despising, resisting, and then accepting this part of me. The perfectionist that at one time was a huge Self protector but then ultimately became a big source of feeling shame and inadequacy.

My current stance on this topic of being perfect or feeling that we need to be perfect leads to some of the A's I try to practice daily and share with my clients. I like to refer to these as states of being that create expansion, connection, and more love.

Rather than seeing yourself as needing to be perfect, you could practice being Aware of your process and Acknowledge your progress.

When we Allow ourselves the space to be exactly who we are today (now), rather than who we think we need to be, we move towards feeling greater Acceptance of Self. As as result, we are able to give Attention to things, to others, to life in a completely new, present and whole way.

No longer trying to fix ourselves (or others) so we can feel better. We simply remember to be conscious enough to practice the 5 A's as often as possible. The magic of being in these states is that the more we practice them with our Self, the more ease we feel in being this way with our loved ones.

This isn't taught to us by our parents or our teachers in school. I'm not exactly sure why. If we learned the 5 A's in Kindergarten and were given guidance on how to practice them daily, perhaps we would be different humans living in a much different kind of world.

As for me personally, I have decided to try and makes these the pillars of what I hope will be a long, happy and fruitful marriage. A quick example on how to practice all 5 A's at once is to make it a habit to look at my partner and gaze into his beautiful eyes. Sometimes, he gets squirmy about it at first and then once we have locked eyes, he remembers what it's about.

I will write them here again for you to ponder and begin to practice. These are in no perfect order:

Be Aware

Give Your Attention

Offer Acknowledgement

Let Go of Control and Allow

Accept What Is

Reminder peoples: All any of us humans ever truly want is to feel seen, heard, felt, understood, and above all...Accepted just as we are. This is Love. Always has been, Always will be.

Irving Park - July 5, 2020

Writings for Wonder

Creative writing has been helping to brighten up the gloomy days of 2020. Below is a short haiku about my view on life.

Haiku for the soul

Life is a river

We the vessels that transform

To trust in its flow.

---

I am most excited to share this piece below written by my talented and open-hearted classmate Kirsten Olsen.

You, Incredible You!

Do you know what the Universe wants most for your life? The Universe wants you to feel as incredible about yourself as it feels about you. And that's pretty incredible! You are incredible. There is no one else like you. You are a precious gift to this world!

We are all incredible. We are all unique. And probably, most of us don't show up in the world that way. We don't feel that way about ourselves. We don't treat ourselves that way.

But that is the challenge we've been given in this life--to treat ourselves with the love and devotion that our inherent divinity in form deserves.

I remember a phrase that someone (my psychiatrist, actually), used on me when I was a young teenager. He said, "Who the H do you think you are, God?" He was trying to point out that I didn't need to take responsibility for everyone around me. I used it, of course, to castigate myself and make myself feel guilty, like I did with everything back then.

But now, looking back, I wonder what would have happened if I'd said, "Yes, I do think I'm God! And so are you, and everyone else in this world!" If we just treated ourselves and each other with the same care and devotion we offer God, the world would blossom into Heaven on Earth before our very eyes!

That is the key to this life on earth. And most people don't even get a glimpse of it! We have been schooled to see problems wherever we look, to seek out the negative, fix it and move on to the next thing.

For me, and for many like me, it was easy to cheer for other people, see the good in them, listen to their worries and concerns, hold space for their feelings. It was in learning to do those things for myself that my life began to turn around.

It isn't easy to cheer for ourselves. Most of us were never taught how to do that, much less provided examples of how to do it.  Many of us were taught just the opposite--to criticize ourselves and tear ourselves down.

So, here's a place to start. What if everything we do is 'right'. No matter what it may be, we are always doing whatever we're doing, just right. If you're sitting and reading this blog, you are doing that perfectly. If you're frustrated by what I'm writing, you're being frustrated perfectly.  If you are distracted by other things, you are distracted perfectly.

Let that be a starting place for cheering yourself on. Give yourself the chance to speak out loud, or silently, to no one but yourself, exactly what you're doing perfectly in whatever moment you are in.

Congratulate yourself on the simplest things that you are doing right. Wow, you have really got that breathing down! Look at the fine way you are sitting!

I am so proud of how well you are living you life at this moment. You deserve to have all your dreams come true!

May you be blessed with the most incredible cheerleader on the planet! YOU!

Fear Transforms to Trust

Staring at his reflection, his face was vividly engraved in the tree I layed down next to.

Looking at me as though saying 'you are not alone. I am here with you. I will protect you.'

It had been a long week of exploration, adventure, exhaustion, connection, regression, and progression.

This would be our last night in the wilderness only this time, we were told to sleep on our own with only the comfort of our sleeping bag, cozy socks, whatever warm clothes we had, and our flash light to keep us company and use for protection if needed.

Being the scaredy cat that I am, I initially felt terrified by the idea of sleeping alone out in nature on a mountaintop. No tent, just me with the ground, where anything could cause me discomfort or harm. For starters, I've never been tough for cold temperatures. I'm a Texas girl with South American blood.

On other nights, I relied on sleeping close to my friends/peers for safety and body warmth. And what if an animal decided to attack me in the middle of the night or even worse, eat me!

Being alone on this final night of bravery felt like a test of my strength and courage to fight through fear. More than anything, it was a test of my faith to believe that I was ok, that I would be ok, and that I would be protected by something. By God, Mother Nature, the Universe, an All Knowing Force. Well, it turned out I was being protected by Jesus himself.

He somehow managed to transform his image into the trunk of this sturdy, magnificent tree and allowed me to see him. Not only that, he inspired me to feel his gentle presence and love in a surprising, profound way.

As my tense body relaxed, my heart slowed down, my eyes grew heavy and breath by breath, I eased into letting go enough to trust him fully with my survival, my life.

Something deep inside me knew I was safe and sound. I would rest. My eyes fixed on his reflection in the bark of the tree standing firm and wise next to me.

* this is about my experience on a wilderness trip with Young Life the summer after my junior year of high school in 1994. A time in my life that forever changed me and my relationship with nature and God.

** tree shown here is from a camping tree last year where I again felt deeply connected with a tree, only this particular tree seems to reveal the image of woman with bright eyes and beautiful eyelashes. Can you see her?

Let's Get Seen

When nobody was around, I felt a mixture of comfort and disease. Comfort in the silence, the not having to worry about what others were feeling. Disease about sitting with myself.

So much thinking and pain, shame, sadness, FEAR. Enough fear to fill up a haunted house and make it come to life.

If nobody was around, it meant I was free to do as I please. What will I do with these moments of aloneness? Shall I climb a tree, write, draw, color, or cry?

Oh wait, I know I'll sit around feeling sorry for myself while asking lots of Whys?

Why do I feel so empty? Why do I feel so helpless, so hopeless?

Why can't I feel 'normal' or even better, happy?

What is happy anyway? Is it feeling grateful?

I do have things to feel thankful for – I've got my looks, my smile, my long brown wavy hair. None of this outside stuff matters when you feel so sad and worthless on the inside.

When nobody was around, I would play pretend and imagine myself as a famous movie star. I would sit in front of the bathroom mirror, put my feet in the sink, and talk with myself. I'd make up stories that would usually end in crying. I like to pretend cry at age 3.

Perhaps all of this acting was preparing me for the real tears to come later on in my adulthood.

Growing up feels fun at times, but mostly hard. Life throws you in to experience real, raw pain in the form of abandonment, betrayal, heart break, loss, loneliness, disappointment, disallusionment.

When nobody was around, I dealt with all of this pain. I faced it head on in the mirror, stayed with it, hated it, loved it, cracked open and found the true me under all the dark, gloomy muck that stuck to me each time I loved someone new.

When nobody was around, I healed from the inside out. Dark, dark tunnel and at the end there was light.

Bright sun shining on my face, big heart, new start, Healed and still Healing.

*Being vulnerable is truly the only way to Be. This was written to honor my many years of struggling with depression and codependency.

We officially turn one today even though the idea of rooting and connecting came to life in 2014. Thank you for reading and for being a part of the Root&Connect LLC journey!

What If...

What if we all lived in accordance with our heart and not our brain?

Awaken each morning to check with heart center, place our hand on our chest to hear its beat and truly listen to the inner guidance and wisdom it lovingly offers.

The heart lives in the present. Yeah sure it has memories of old wounds that may not be completely healed, but the blood that pumps through it each day is its form of cleansing and renewal

Staying connected with our heart would drown out the sounds of the ego, the inner critic, the emotions rooted in fear and 'not enoughness'.

A heart is created full and remains full as long you give it the nourishment it needs and craves.

Your own love, the warmth of your hand on it, your compassion, your willingness to sit with it in the good times and the not so good.

This heart is like a muscle waiting for its workout, like the baby waiting for its bottle, like the flowers waiting for the bees, like the trees waiting for someone to come sit under its shade and notice its intricate leaves.

The brain wants to solve, the hearts wants to open, to give, to heal, to feel everything.

Keep listening to your brain, stay there as long as you like.

After enough suffering on the mental hamster wheel, your exhaustion and inner chaos will have no other choice but to direct you downwards...into the heart, the land of green, the place created especially for you to feel alive and human.

What if our hearts spoke with one another before our mouths did?

Ah…like cats purring.

Now, this would be pure peace and authenticity.

All Love!

For more What if’s, see Pandemic Ponderings below written by my talented fiance Chris…

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Pandemic Ponderings by Chris Chapin

Fight the infection. Stay informed. Shelter in place. Numb the pain. Hoard. Isolate. Survive.

We are living in a wonderland, where down is up and good is bad. Where bustling communities are now fragmented like splintered glass, our weary reflections etched upon the mangled shards. We yearn for communication. A comradery with a kindred spirit, but even though through Zoom we hear it, we miss the very basis of relation. A touch, a hug, a kiss, a handshake, all causalities of this crisis, will we ever connect the same way again? No contact. What is freedom without those to share it? The last man on earth has the world as his oyster and though his body his free his mind is cloistered. No one to share with, no one to laugh, no one to love and no one to hate, his isolation becomes his undoing. Our society has morphed where the free are in cages and the caged are the freest of all, for there is no social distancing among the damned. How farther will we follow the white rabbit?

Hop, hop, hop, bounce, bounce, bounce… the ball rolls methodically across the gym floor, echoing throughout the barren chamber. It’s reverberations haunting my now faded memories. The gym was a place I visited often. The feel of the leathery ball on the hardwood floor, the squeak of sneakers sprinting down the baseline, I was hooked. It brought out the passion in me, it brought out my competitiveness, it allowed me to engage in all the good things in life and release myself from the pressures of this world. I could step onto the court and it was my own nirvana, an oasis for my soul. With rising health concerns, my gym became darkened and subsequently so did my spirits. What if it doesn’t reopen? The droplets of doubts and worries and uncertainties continue to coalesce and gush through my brain like a torrential downpour, flooding any semblance of rational thought. What if my kids lose ground in school, what if the economy doesn’t recover, what if we can’t get married, what if I lose my job? What if this pessimism is the new normal? The great calamity of isolation isn’t the disease of the few, it’s the doubt of the many that accompanies it.

From Yin to Yang

Yin is the dark and Yang is the light.

Today, I'd like to share some phrases I've heard from others that captured the attention of my brain and heart. These words have helped me shift perspective so that I'm able to approach life (and what happens for me) in a lighter way. They also remind me to not take myself too seriously.

- Pour your mind into your breath. ~ yoga teacher R.D.

Doesn't the imagery of this make you feel more free inside?

I imagine my mind as an antique water jug filled with endless thoughts that need to be freed into an open space of flowing energy and movement. The endless currents of my thinking need a place to deposit just as the rivers run into the oceans.

- Relax, nothing is under control. ~ yoga teacher R.D.

I love a good oxymoron! This one screws with & fascinates my brain kind of like a rubiks cube does. As humans, we are almost always wanting to feel in control because we like things our way or we want to be certain of what will happen next. Essentially, we seek safety, security or comfort.

If this pandemic has taught us anything, it is that nothing is under control.

What does this statement bring up for you- a sense of fear or freedom?

If you can learn to believe deep down in your core, that you are okay and no matter what, you will be okay...the practice of relaxing becomes more natural and easy.

- Smile at your brain. ~ yoga teacher R.D.

Oh dear brain, how I love you and despise you. We give so much of our power to the brain while often times we ignore our heart. If we could remember to smile at our brain then perhaps we could learn to take it less seriously. The master of the brain is the body and the master of the body is our breath. Smile at your brain and lighten up. Think less, feel more.

- This is exceptionally temporary. ~ M.E.

Old Buddhist saying? Not exactly, but sure does sound like one. Expressed by a creative client of mine who didn't realize the wisdom in his words. As the Buddhist teachings remind us – 'Everything in life is temporary. Every birth is a death. Every death is a birth. Transformation is infinite.'

Isn't everything in life extraordinarily temporary?

Life has become more enjoyable to live since the moment my mind and heart both accepted that everything is a process. All things are ever-changing. This includes our Self. We are a process and our state of being is exceptionally temporary. Today you will think and feel one way. Tomorrow you may wake up to think and feel a new way.

This is what makes living life so beautiful. There is a gentle delicacy with impermanence, similar to the cherry blossom petals that fall each spring.

Bask in the temporary called now. Move towards the light by working to reframe how you perceive your reality.

Open Your Heart

This time of major SLOW DOWN and INTROSPECTION has felt healing and chaotic with BIG WAVES OF EMOTION ranging from Gratitude to Helplessness.

I like to listen to an astrologer who calls himself Kaypacha. You can find him on youtube under the name Astrology for the Soul. His astrological reading for March 18th was informative and heart altering for me.

Here I share some of what he says:

“Let's learn from this experience. Check the health effects on the planet. Move into the future responsibly. We need to be taking responsibility for the old people, for each other, for our self, for the great Mother.”

“When we put profit above Life, the environment., and above everything else to the point of lying, hiding or denying; this is what has brought this on from a spiritual perspective. This is a major reset to help us get back to the human nature, to our human qualities and go forward as a family to create future community.”

“It is very sad that death, panic, and crashing economies are necessary to wake us up to this need to stay in our heart's space.”

He ends his message with this:

“Mantra for now: When I live today like there is no tomorrow, I give thanks for the love I have shared with other. May you share the love. Aloha, Namaste, So much love.”

These words inspired me to look back on some of my photos from earlier times when the world seemed more alright than it does now. I stumbled upon something I had written a while ago but never shared.

Kaypacha’s message to stay in my heart space encouraged me to practice being vulnerable and open my heart to all of you here by sharing some of what I feel love for in this life.

After reading this, I hope it may move you to want to explore in your own heart what it is that you love. Take some time to write it down. Perhaps one day when you are no longer living in physical form here on planet Earth, others who knew and loved you will be able to rejoice with your spirit by remembering you and what you felt deep love for.

I Love…

I love how crisp everything looks outside after a good rain.

I love hearing a cat purr when I rub its belly.

I love watching the sun set.

I love it when a butterfly flutters around me.

I love when someone remembers something I said a while ago and brings it up.

I love how everyone’s laugh, sneeze, and voice sounds different.

I love to ride my bike with no hands.

I love when I surprise myself and discover I’m good at something I’ve never tried before.

I love the sound of the ocean both on land and underwater.

I love being kissed all over my face including my eyelids.

I love when someone sees something in me that I haven’t quite fully discovered in myself.

I love feeling cared for by someone who nurtures me with all their heart.

I love when someone is genuinely curious about me and asks questions that no one has ever asked me before.

I love watching people dance.

I love it when people smile.

I love watching children use their imaginations.

I love feeling the aliveness and energy that people exude when they are performing and engaged in something they love to do with all their heart and soul.

I love people who wear their emotions on their sleeve because they have nothing to hide.

I love to feel loved.

I love to love.

I love watching a person create, especially a child.

I love how God knows every part of me and pours his love into me through the Holy Spirit each and every day.

February 2016 - one month after moving to Portland, Oregon from Austin, Texas - my first visit to Cannon Beach on a magically perfect day!

Earth Birthed Anew

In the midst of this crazy time for the globe, I've been reflecting on what I want to say and how I want to say it.

What? and How? are two questions that I imagine many of us in the world may be stewing on right now.

What is going to happen?

What do I do with myself?

How can I help?

How will we come out of this?

How will things be different when the dust settles?

Despite all of the chaos that I hear about when tuning into the news or social media, there has been a new sense of calm and stillness that is difficult to put into words. It's a feeling. A kind of massive slow down which at certain times feels like an actual planet pause.

Ever since physical distancing started and hunkering down at home became the new norm, I've adopted a self care routine that I thank my intuition for guiding me into because it truly has been my saving grace.

Staying connected with nature and observing new life grow is one constant that I am relying on right now for reassurance. Being consistent with a daily 20 minute meditation has been essential to my maintaining balance (for the most part) and feeling grounded. It has felt as though source from Mother Earth has been blessing me with revelations of truth and healing so that I can stay centered enough to be able to help those around me and the people that I work with.

During one of my meditations, I was visited by the sun who was encouraging me to tell others about its healing powers by imagining that we could place the sun inside of ourselves. The heat, warmth, and energy of the sun would be our weapon to 1. protect us and 2. heal us from the inside out.

In a different meditation, I began to feel the weight of the world's economic crisis and literally felt my heart heavy as I imagined all of the people who are experiencing intense, raw fear about not being able to work and make money to pay for their basic necessities. This pain that felt so real and energetically charged was soothed by a visualization of trees turning their leaves into paper money raining on all of the earth. That moment in time felt precious. Fear and anxiety transformed into abundance and generosity.

This Monday's meditation revealed two words that have become my new mantra: Appreciate and Accept.

In some ways, I would like to believe that we are all being given this “coronacation” because a global transformation is in order and absolutely necessary for the well being of our Mother Earth and all of the hearts that breathe and live on it.

Of course, I know that for many people in the world, this is the furthest thing from a vacation or a time of relief. I want to honor that. There is no greater pain than the kind we experience when we lose someone we love or fear we may lose them. Fear and loneliness also cause us tremendous pain.

It's as though this pandemic has created an enormous energetic wave of grief and loss throughout the world that almost feels like a permanent veil we are all having to learn how to breathe through.

If you weren’t feeling your emotions before the virus, what emotions are you experiencing on a daily basis, now that it has impacted your community and loved ones in one way or another?

Loss of freedom and control constricts our hearts. Uncertainty rattles our brains. The fear we all normally carry in our bellies is being exposed and our anxiety causes an unfamiliar panic inside us that in certain moments feels impossible to tame.

With all of this going on, I can imagine that looking inward right now seems terrifying. But, what if perhaps all of this is happening for this exact reason? For the purpose to slow us down enough to take a pause and shine some light inside our self while we sit and feel this darkness?

Our 'normal' life goes something like this: So many day to day distractions, constant going, thinking, consistent pressures to do more, achieve more, make more, be more. The level of stress that most of us carry around in our bodies as a result of living this way is slowly killing us. The pandemic virus could potentially result in the same fate, the only difference being the longevity of our suffering.

I've discovered during this trying time that my antidote for fear is to practice two things – gratitude and generosity. Gratitude by feeling a deep appreciation for even the smallest of things and truly seeing the wonder in simplicity. Mindfulness helps me with this as it has been a close confidant of mine for the last 10 years. Being more present to what is rather than what I want it to be is what saved me from the dark depths of depression and anxiety years ago. And this ability to be present with myself, others, and life is what now serves as my armor while I learn to embrace being a spiritual warrior.

A spiritual warrior is one who lives in alignment with their truth through conscious choice of what they want to live for and how they want to live. My spiritual warriorship depends on God because this is the force that I believe to be in charge of all and everything for better or for worse.

The spiritual warrior inside me rests in peace asking these questions:

What will I choose to focus on moment to moment?

How will I relate to my own pain that ultimately stems from my fear of not being in control and not knowing for certain what will happen?

Thankfully the answers to my questions have already come to me from source during one of my morning meditations: I choose to Appreciate and Accept. I do this because I trust in God with all of my heart and accept his/her will.

I invite you to shift the focus of your What? and How? questions so that your moments of decision produce a better outcome for you and those around you.

What can I do in this moment to take better care of myself?

What positive affirmations will I choose to focus on to combat my fear?

What will my new norm look like when this passes?

How can I extend myself towards others so that I am less consumed by my own pain?

How can I move into a state of appreciation for what remains good and accept what is?

How will I choose to live more consciously once the pause button is released?

Please stay Pause-itive as Mother Earth takes some deep breaths before we are birthed anew. Sending love out to all of you.

**If you would like help or encouragement to create your own daily self care routine, please feel free to reach out. Self care = self love and this is what Root & Connect is all about.

“Prov. 3 Verses 5 to 6

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

What Gets You In...To the Moment?

Whenever one of my sessions leads us into a meditation exercise where I am encouraging a client to close their eyes and go inward, the outcome when we open our eyes and return to the room sounds something like this:

'That was relaxing' or 'Wow, I just noticed how stressed I am' or 'I feel much more calm'

It's interesting for me to imagine my life where the only time I close my eyes is when I am ready to fall asleep.

This begs the question of: Do most people only stop to relax when their head hits the pillow?

This thought leads me into a web of curiosity where my mind ponders things like:

How do people really know themselves if they never spend a quiet moment in silence and stillness?

When do people truly connect with their inner most self (higher self) if they never stop to check in?

Why is it so hard for people to stop moving, thinking, doing?

The truth is that after years of working with people in an up close and personal way, I've learned that the majority of us struggle with anxiety that manifests in these ways:

• planning

• self-criticizing

• judging

• feeling angry

• controlling by trying to guarantee an outcome

• spending time in our head asking 'what if' questions

The Root of Anxiety is the emotion of Fear.

The more we resist being alone in (and with) our self, with our own thoughts and emotions, the greater the fear will grow and persist. This then becomes an emotional pattern that we become accustomed to, not necessarily comfortable with (see image below).

What if I told you that the only way to dissolve the Fear is to sit with it?

Think about something that you do now in your life that gets you into the present moment.

For me, this is meditation, a bike ride, drawing, coloring, writing, mindful walking, admiring nature, hugging a tree, rubbing my cat’s belly, cooking, seeing, touching, smelling, and tasting my food, massaging my body with oil, laying down in the grass, staring up at the clouds. I could go on and on…

This can be any activity that requires your focused attention, however, does not necessarily involve staring at a screen. When we are on screens, we are focused on what we are looking at, however, this does not mean that we are actually in the moment. Quite the contrary, we are escaping reality to feel disconnected from the here and now...the actual moment.

Now, see if you can close your eyes for a few moments. Check in. What do you feel?

This could be the most important moment of your day.

Your Core Self

This is one of my favorite things to talk about because I truly feel passionate about exploring the Self.

Our Self is dynamic and complex even when we want to keep it simple.

Think of the practices we hear about and/or try to understand so that we are able to form a different kind of relationship with our self. I like to imagine that they unfold in this kind of order where one practice morphs into the next. This natural flow of our development occurs so that we can learn how to live feeling better about our self as we wade through life.

self control

self discipline

self awareness

self care

self love

self acceptance

self worth

self empowerment

Ultimately, these practices serve as a barometer to measure how we feel about ourselves and the way we choose to engage with people, places, and things.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a specific form of therapy that I use with clients to help them better understand themselves and why they operate the way they do.

The IFS theory is that each person is a system made up of parts which dictate how we relate with our own self, our relationships, and daily living. Inside each of us is a family of parts influencing what we place our focus on, how we respond to situations, and how we manage to keep our system functioning, safe, and alive.

The part I like best about IFS is the belief that we are all born with a Core Self and when we allow ourselves to be led by this Core Self, we engage in ways that help us to feel whole, happy, and fulfilled.

When we are living from our Core Self, we are BEING and FEELING these ways:

CURIOUS

CALM

CENTERED

CONFIDENT

CONNECTED

COURAGEOUS

COMPASSION

CLARITY

CREATIVE

Lately, I have been encouraging my clients to make their own list of the Core Self values to put them somewhere visible so they can begin the practice of trying to incorporate these ways of being and feeling into their daily life.

Can you imagine what the world would be like if we CHOSE to wake up everyday telling our self that we will relate with our own self and engage with whatever comes our way from a place of:

calmness, curiosity, feeling centered, willing to connect, offering compassion, having courage and clarity, feeling confident and being creative?

I believe that these core self values could be the solution to much of the suffering that happens in the world. Practicing them could be a revolutionary way to teach our children what to focus on and ways they can strive to be and feel on a daily basis.

When it comes to the relationship with myself and with others, I know that the more I practice these core self values, the better I feel as a person.

This is an invitation to start today right where you are. Print out this list or write these core values down in your own personal handwriting. Put them on the fridge, share them with your kids, partners, friends, family, and coworkers.

Begin by telling yourself: 'For today, I will try to practice being and feeling: calm, curious, centered, connected, compassionate, courageous, clear, confident and creative.

Simple Things Matter Most

These words have been in the making in my mind for quite some time. They were inspired most recently during a yoga class by this woman's foot you see here above. And before that, from a book I have been reading mindfully for the last year called 'The Hidden Life of Trees'.

It's the kind of book where one chapter feeds you enough information to chew on for days. Then when you're done chewing, you go out into nature to hang with trees with a new consciousness about what's going on inside of them.

I've enjoyed getting to know the life of trees on a deeper, more intimate level because 1. I love trees and 2. I like to explore things on a more intimate level.

Intimate defined as an adjective means very friendly, or personal or private. Originally the spelling was 'intime' from French and from Latin 'intimus' meaning 'innermost', from intus meaning 'within'.

So basically, I am interested in understanding 'the innermost, within' places of human beings and trees. Cats would be fun too. You know, the simple things.

What I've learned from this book is that underneath our feet living in the soil amongst the trees are more life forms than there are people on the planet. Wow!

These species work the soil, transform it, and make it valuable for the trees. They are so important and yet they cannot be detected with the naked eye. These practically invisible little creatures are actually the first link in the food chain.

This was mind enlightening information which brought a new awareness for me about the circle of life. I had always known the importance of soil in order to grow food, but I had no idea of the multitude of tiny creatures doing their part to help both us and trees sustain life on earth.

I have felt influenced to be even more intentional about the small and simple things we usually take for granted and/or don't even think about. I've been noticing more, particularly in nature. The tiny leaves of a flower, the softness of petals, the smell of a stem, the aging of trees, the soil beneath my feet.

As my way of giving back, I try to imagine these little life forms being busy underground and working hard to keep this all going. I send them love and energy through feeling gratitude for them. I do this because I want to feel a more intimate connection to them while supporting their cause.

Why? Because I truly believe that we are all one. We are one with all living things. Even the simple things we think don't matter, are in reality the things that matter most.

This time of year reminds us to feel and demonstrate gratitude. What do you feel gratitude for? Who are you grateful to have in your life?

Take a mindful moment to express this gratitude to others and to all the simple things around you. And don't forget the little guys that live beneath our feet.

Happy Give Thanks Day this week and every day!

The Combination of Fortune and Will

My recent favorite yoga studio and teacher inspire creativity for my spirit and balance for my body.

The teacher I enjoy most is a woman with long dark curly hair, hazel eyes, and fair skin. She has a tenderness to her and an enthusiasm for yoga unlike any I've encountered before. Her playful style is infectious so naturally, when she speaks in the class, her words truly land. They land in my heart and vibrate my spirit because the knowledge she shares about the body and how to relate with it, wakes me up.

One thing I've caught her say at the end of class when we are closing is this 'It is the combination of fortune and will that brought us here today to share this space and do something good for our body and our Self. Let us be thankful to these two things that have made it possible'.

These may not be her words verbatim, but it's the gist of what I hear and how I receive it.

Now isn't this something we can say about just about anything?

What I mean is that life can be viewed as a series of moments where we see, hear, interpret, and then choose to accept or reject.

I write about this perfect combo of fortune and will because the thought is intriguing and makes me want to explore its meaning in more depth.

So let's see…Fortune + Will = What? A certain result, a desired outcome, an invigorating yoga class or maybe just an experience that feels important for both body, mind, and spirit.

Ah yes, yoga means union of body, mind and spirit. As far as I am concerned this is not only an experience, it is THE experience worth living for. I don't mean THE ONLY experience worth living for. What I do mean is that bringing these parts into union is what helps us to experience feeling a sense of wholeness.

So wait, I think I've got it now...Fortune + Will = Feeling Whole and why is this such a big deal?

Well, because this is what we are all longing for regardless of whether or not we are aware of it.

We humans all seek to feel complete so that we can divert the itch in us all that tells us:

'you are not enough', 'there is something missing', 'you need this to be happy', 'do something and you will feel worthy', 'your life only has meaning if you do, succeed, and others notice and accept it'

I am sorry to tell you this, but that itch inside of us which I like to refer to as the inner critic, is wrong. The inner critic wants you to believe that life is about striving to be perfect, to have more, to look better, to be liked by everyone or else...you are nothing and life has no meaning.

The sooner you begin to realize that this itch inside of you is merely an old part of you which is attached to the wounded child inside of you rather then the adult you who has the power to heal those wounds, the better you will choose to live your life.

Not for any one thing or endeavor, but because life is meant to be lived feeling gratitude, peace, joy, and curiosity - the sum of these being LOVE.

I've got one more for you...Fortune + Will = Living Life to its Fullest.

For me, Fortune does not mean cash money. It means Luck with a whole of lot of Belief and Gratitude. Another way I say Fortune is Blessed.

And Will means Energy, Motivation, and Choice. I have to Will myself to Believe. I have to Will myself to do.

Will is what gets me in the morning:

'Today, I Will make this a great day. I Will choose to be grateful. I will choose to be happy with what IS rather than how my brain tells me it 'should' be'.

Speaking of Fortune and Will...I have to admit that this is a recent theme in my life for another reason outside of yoga class. For at least 15 years, I have wanted to visit Greece. Why?

1. I love Greek food and culture

2. I like the way Greek people look (I am a sucker for dark hair and light eyes..green or blue)

3. I am an island girl at heart

4. The beach and me..we are one

5. The idea of going to Greece has always sounded romantic

This year I Willed this Dream to Come True. I was Fortunate enough to go to Greece for 2 weeks and island hop to some of the most spectacular places I have ever seen. I took in the views, the culture, the food, the people, the beaches, the sun, and so so much beauty. The big plus is that I got to experience all of this with my dream guy.

And so...Fortune + Will = The Experience of a Lifetime

The things I learned about Greece that I didn't already know:

1. The lamb gyro we eat here in America, does not exist there. They eat only pork or chicken gyros.

2. Veal is a common dish on the menu.

3. Greece is full of feral cats everywhere. I took 122 pictures of cats for the 2020 cat calendar I Will to create.

4. Toilet paper is not allowed to be flushed down the toilets. Even in the larger cities like Athens.

5. Gelato is big there.

6. Many Greek people have beautiful blue eyes.

7. The evil eye is everywhere which they use as a symbol for protection and positive energy.

8. Souvlaki refers to shish kabob.

9. Cigarette smoking is still in style.

10. Coffee is served with the grounds in the cup.

11. The Mediterranean Sea remains to be my favorite water to swim in.

12. The people of Greece are warm, friendly, and somewhat intense which the Latina in my loved.

In what ways can the combination of Fortune and Will help you to Live and Feel the way that you truly want?

Make 3 wishes now, write them down, and then Will yourself to make these dreams happen!

Fortune is in the heart of the Beholder.

Cable car in Santorini, Greece